ek tute kalam ki syaahi

नही तोड़ सकूँगा नभ के तारे,
चांद के संग रहते वोह सारे,
ला नही सकता गगन ज़मीन पर,
क्या चांद का दिल मैं तोड़ सकूँगा?
क्या यादें तेरी छोड़ सकूँगा,
जाते लम्हे जोड़ सकूँगा?

जी ना सकूं तुम बिन शायद,
शायद एक पल, शायद एक दिन,
पर क्या तुम बिन जीवन छोड़ सकूँगा?
तुमको तनहा छोड़ सकूँगा?
क्या यादें तेरी छोड़ सकूँगा,
जाते लम्हे जोड़ सकूँगा?

तुम बिन मेरा क्या है जीवन?
बिन मंज़िल का राही,
एक टूटे कलम कि स्याही
क्या पन्ने कोरे छोड़ सकूँगा?
क्या यादें तेरी छोड़ सकूँगा,
जाते लम्हे जोड़ सकूँगा?

A political satire on re-elections

गिर पडी सरकार

गिर पडी सत्ता और एक बार,
जनता के मत्थे मधेगी एक नयी सरकार
फिर आया नेताओं का बहाव
देश में केवल इनका नही है आभाव
नज़र आये सारे लल्लू एक अर्से के बाद
सब मिल आये हैं करने देश को बर्बाद

बडे और झूठे आश्वाशन अब भी हैं
पिच्च्ले वादे पुरे नही हुए तो क्या?
वादों में टेल और राशन अब भी हैं
जनता पिच्च्ली बार सो गयी तो क्या?
लंबे-लंबे भाषण अब भी हैं
पाण्डवों का युग गया तो क्या?
खेमे में शकुनी और दुश्शाशन अब भी हैं.

निकलेंगी फिर से रैल्लियाँ, मंडराएँगे चमचे
उतर आएंगे धुरंदर नीचे, मांगेंगे वोट हमसे
चुनाव चिनंह लक्ष्मी और उनका वाहन नेता है
राजनीती के खेल में जनता मूक दर्शक, लीडर निर्देशक, कैशिएर, अभिनेता है

सोचता हूँ इस बार वोट मैं भी दाल दूं
रैली में बात ते नोट कुच्छ मई भी संभाल लूं
और अगर राजनीती नही होती तो देश के नित्ठालों का क्या होता?
पासवान चबाता खैनी नुक्कड़ पर, लालू तबेले में लगा होता
फिर भी नेता तो आख़िर नेता है, वोह भी खुदा का एक बन्दा है
आख़िर तो भी बेचारा क्या करे, यही तो उसका धंदा है.

Children of a lesser God

why all us trapped in blocks of concrete
are different those down in the streets?
Why does He serves them hunger and you your fulsome greed?
maybe we are the heirs of the almighty Lord
and they, children of a lesser God

Another one of those "existential" poems

???

Whats the truth and whats not?
Whats given and whats got?
who am I, whats my thought
What I think and what I jot

Am I th king of my fate
or just another piece on of the draught?
Is it all I can acquire?
Is it all that can be bought

Is life just another four lettered word
or does it mean more than what is sought
could this be the last day of my life
or will I just carry on like the awful lot?

Will my questions ever be answered?
In my quest will I forever trot?
Am trying to find the answers since forever
Maybe, I'll ask Him then, when I am back to naught

Inspired by listening to old nostalgic Ghazal records

फुर्सत के दिन

वोह गरजते पानी के छींटे
वोह कीचड में सने दिन
वोह छोटी कागज कि कश्तियां
वोह हर पल डूबता सूरज, पूरब से पश्छिम

वोह सर्द हवाओं के झोंकय
वोह दोस्तो कि किलकारियाँ
वोह गिरकर उठकर भागना,
वोह माँ का डांटना हर दिन

मुट्ठी में रेत सा खिसकता वक़्त
काश! तभी ठहर जाता
काश! कुच्छ रेत मई अपनी जेब में भर पाता
रूक जता शायद वोह समय वोह पल-छीन

पलट कर देखता हूँ मैं
पर शायद कई मोड़ गुज़र चुके हैं तब से अब तक
ढूँढता हूँ फिर भी मैं उन्हें,
जाने कहाँ गए वोह फुर्सत के दिन

School reunion

(l-r Sunil, Sushant, Shivram, Abhilash, Srini)














(Srini, Biren, Swagata, Nisha, Me, Manoj)















(Abhilash, Srini, Biren, Swagata, Nisha)















(Swagata, Nisha, Me, Manoj (still on the phone) )

"can somebody please turn off the movie screen?"

watched a couple of movies last week. the second movie was a bit of surprise 'coz I didn't think I'll be able to survive the first one. lets begin.


1. Movie - Fanaa
Slogan - Destroyed in movie halls

Summary - "Terrorist falls for a visually impaired girl. Gets toasted by the visually impaired girl."

English is a very inexpressive language. It can not convey the pain of wave of emotions that hit me when I remember my very uncomfortable 3 hours watching this movie.

Aamir ("Rihaan") is tourist guide in Delhi, now I have been to places and I have seen guides, Aamir did not look, act or sound like a guide. infact, he could be mistaken for a road side romeo - complete with trite shayaris and over the top hamming. The way the guy tries to grab the poor blind girl in every other frame looks like an eve-teasing FIR waiting to happen. But, our poor blind girl is more than happy to encourage his acts.
To cut the crap, Aamir woos the girl, gets her, does her, dumps her. Kajol (who we all know is the most fertile actress ever - remember "Dil kya kare"?) gets pregnant before Aamir dumps her.
It turns out Aamir is actually a terrorist working for an outfit called IKF - Incredibly Kontrived Force। IKF fights both India and Pakistan (hey, we wanna make money there too); is controlled by a guy called "Nana Jaan" and has a single soldier in its army. The soldier ofcourse is Aamir (whose name unbelievingly actually is "Rihaan", talk about going under-cover).

Slept after that.


p.s. this post was in draft for way too long, so gave it some breathing space.

kyon apna ho kar bhi begana sa lagta hai ab mera yeh desh?

kyon nahi bhaati ab mujhe woh pehli barsaat ki khusboo
kyon nahi bharta hai gaurav mujhmein ab woh rashtra-geet ka sandesh
kyon ab lagta hai ab mit jayega mera astitva ya jo kuchch hai ab shesh
kyon apna ho kar bhi begana sa lagta hai ab mera yeh desh?

manzilein kabhi thi raston ke dooje chhor pe,
manzilein ab bhi wahin hain, badla hai bas rasto ke bhesh
beech mein ab hai ik khaai, dono taraf ab eershya aur klesh
kyon apna ho kar bhi begana sa lagta hai ab mera yeh desh?

Black coffee with Karan

Karan Thapar's interview with hon. HRD minister Mr. Arjun singh.

Mr. Arjun Singh doesn't his As from his Bs. If there was one guy who could win "Single most stupid move to destroy a country's future", this guy would win hands down for his brilliant act.

Here's his interview with Karan Thapar. Arjun Singh sounds like a lost lamb. The country feels so much safer with people like him in charge.


Brilliant piece of interviewing throughout. But, the ending takes the cake (and the icing):

Karan Thapar: What about the Government of India? Has the Government of India failed to respond adequately?

Arjun Singh: From the Government of India also, the Defence Minister met them.

Karan Thapar: Only recently.

Arjun Singh: That is something because everyone was busy with the elections.

Sad, sad state our country is in.

Excellent article on reservations

Excellent article on reservations. Why reservations would never work - even for Mr. Arjun Singh.

http://in.rediff.com/news/2006/may/17guest.htm

Poseidumb

Poseidon - n. greek mythology God of the sea

- n. movie about a namesake ship which (sigh) sank

Watched 'Poseidon' yesterday. Even the god of the sea could not save the movie from sinking.

Let me summarise the movie -

" A ship sinks. Some people survive."

That's it. I just saved u a chhota gandhi and couple of hours of pain. So, what are you doing reading this stupid blog? Go spend it on something better.

For those who have nothing better to do, read on -

Hmm, the movie is about a ship named poseidon (yes, I've already said that. But, hell, its all there is to it). Okay, so this ship is huge and by huge I mean really huge. yes, much much bigger than Rakhi Sawant's 'you know what'. So, this ship is in the sea with all these passengers, doing what big ships do.

It's new year time. Item number by Fergi (Black Eyed Peas). Everyones happy dancing. The moment you see all this hoopla, you know somethings gotta give, this baby's gonna sink and you know how.

Enter a big wall of water. Bam! ship starts sinking. And with that, the movie. Some people try to escape. Some don't make it, some do. As usual as soon as these 6 ppl leave the ship, it drowns. Phew! just in the nick of time.

The movie is as engaging and thrilling as watching your grandma knit (yeah, some ppl may find watching their grandma knit entertaining. I would recommend them the movie).
All said, if you have some money spare in your pocket and don't know how to spend it - courier it to me. I'll be more than happy to invest it in a malty beverage made by fermenting cereal.

Bottom-line:
Titaninc # 1047 other rescue drama movies = Poseidon

# - hash

What it feels like to work for a fortune 500 company

pbbt...

Random thoughts

...and then I realised everything he knew, he learnt, he thought was obsolete. It was like sleeping in the 90s and waking up in the 2400s. It was a dream. No, it was more than a dream, it was real. It was unlike anything he had ever imagined.
It was sad but it could have been worse. And then he felt a strange feeling of happiness within. Or was it just feeling of serendipity? He felt he had discovered something. Something new. Something so enchanting...

High and lows

Virtually everyone who had any chance of promotion got promoted back in the old company. All the 2+ developers became senior developers; all the senior developers became Associate TMs; all the ATMs became TMs; all the TMs became Senior TMs and all the Apples became Oranges.
the skewed developer to manager ratio has been inverted and I guess the company has replaced the old problem with a new one.

anyways, am not an analyst or a seer, so any concers is thrown right out of the window.

Coming to the real thing, ever since I landed up in Pune, most of th days have been like shit. Getting drunk is not a solution 'coz I never get drunk enough. The new job is extremely boring. The team lead and the manager rate me highly and have been handed some stuff which highly product centric and am going nuts over the whole thing.

I don't hope for the better,
'coz there's worse beyond
I guess I'll make it anyways,
'before the lights are gone.

Even the weekends didn't feel all that great. Saw a couple of movies - "Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind" and "A history of Violence". The history thing was crap and the Eternal ssunshine made me feel like crap. Here's a line from the movie...

Valentine's day - a day the card companies invented to make people feel like crap...

sad, sad movie.

Got rejected from Penn State uni for god knows why. Waiting for a rejecteion from virginia tech as well. I guess all that 99 percentile GRE doesn't work if you are really not destined to go.

They say, theres life and career beyond masters in India. Am not sure about the former and I doubt about the latter.


Would really help if I have life beyond my cubicle, can't wait to get out.
Am joining swimming this week, enrolled for another course for the next week. Pune is growing on me. I guess am not all that adaptable.


Surely, this too shall pass...

The adaptation of Pk

Part I going nowhere:

2 full weeks into the job and 2 full weeks in Pune.
If losing a job was difficult, fitting into a new job is harder.
Following is a small chronology of events since landing in
Pune -

26th Feb 2006 -

08:00 am
In the bus from Nagpur. Its suchi's b'day, gotta call her up. Note to self - "call suchi after landing in Pune"
09:00 am
Pune it is. Gotta catch a rick to Hadapsar, a place called 'Pandrah (15) number'. Strange. Note to self - "find out why?". Asked the rick driver. Ups the rate by 50 %. Caught on a back foot, trapped.
Note to self - "don't ever ask a rick driver an address if you don't wanna be taken for a ride. that didn't come out right"

10:00 am
Finally arrive at Pushpendra's hostel, looks kinda erie, the warden/owner/c-grade-horror-flick-actor looks suspiciously at me and my baggage. Am leaving in a couple of hours.

11:00 am
Called up Modi's cousin for a flat. Meeting arranged at 11:30, ganga village.
Caught a rick again, did not ask for the address. Note to self - "enquire the pedestrians about the address pedestrian"

11:45 am
Ganga village is not village, its a township.

12:30 pm - 04:30 pm
Visited 3 flats, each worse than other. Puneites have a very concept of "amenities". Note to self - "look elsewhere. anywhere."

05:00 pm
back in the hostel. lets rest a li'l

05:30 pm
another flat.

06:30 -08:00 pm
No place to go. Get a lodge.
Visited two excuses of a lodge. Third time lucky, this one has a bar. Done.

09:00 pm
End of story. Tomorrow is a long day. Joining IBM.

How to lose a job

Got a new job in IBM last week. Resigned this monday and life has never been the same.
My manager has asked me to do a "Knowledge Transfer" of whatever I've learnt in the company. Have been on a dead and now scrapped project since last 5 months. God knows what sort of a "knowledge transfer" is he expecting me to do.
Resigned a week ago and have had the sleepies week in history. Come to the office everyday, slashdot a little, digg a little, watch cricket scores... all in all wade away my time.
Really sucks you know, I virtually have no job right now. Hope my IBM manager sticks with me and understands the situation or I'll die of boredom.

How to kill time at work

If you are emplyed and in IT, chances are you spend half your time skill building (read: on bench).
Here are a few tricks to spend time in office.


10. Change the keyboard layout to DVORAK and type an essay on "life in IT"
9. Forward your resumes. Include the title: "Will work for food"
8. ...spend the rest of the week sorting the job calls.
7. Dowload the whole Sourforge repository
6. .. write a comment for each line
5. Read H2G2 (or 1984) backwards
4. Watch Ind-Pak test scores....refresh scores every 15 seconds
3. ..write a script to do it for you
2. Surf the net holding the mouse in the wrong hand
1. Write a blog

10 things we have had enough of

• Amitabh Bachchan
  

This guy is something like a million years old and probably has a million times million fans who can't get enough of him. I have had. Mr. Bachchan, I believe you have cleared all your debts; wrung every kind of role dry; the number of models you've rendered jobless is challenged only by the number of wrinkles on your face.
People say, he plays his own age in movies. You know what people his age really do? They end up either in old age homes or babysitting their grand-children.
People are probably sick of seeing you in papers, movies, TV programmes, Ads, news, internet, blogs (oops!). I'll quote your dad (am a big fan of his) on this -

"

Poorab se fir suraj nikla,
jaise hoti thi subah hui,
Kyon sote sote socha tha,
hogi praatah: koi baat nayee
Lo din beeta, lo raat gayee

"

• Cyrus Broacha
  

Another man who should act his age. He is as funny as Johnny Lever (who just missed the cut to this list). Cyrus, when you first adorned the screen (in the mid 80s I think, its been such a long time), you were refreshingly different, now your run of the mill shows are a real PITA. Start looking for another job. Spare us.

• Malaika Arora - khan
  

Who doesnt like seeing skimpily clad 10/10 bodied women pole dancing and staring suggestively in his eyes (err.. camera)? Well, I do of course? Its like eating Masala Dosa - delicious but theres probably only so much you can eat, a masala dosa for each meal for a month and you'd probably not have another for the rest of your life.
It probably sucks having a loser, good-for-nothing husband around the house and she probably has to make all the money while hubby babysits.
Malaika, we have enough of you - in the music videos, in the item numbers, in nach baliye (it was such a relief when it was over. no more shmucky ads!), in 287 other irrelevant/insignificant dance/talent/dramebaazi show, in 314 movie/tele/adworld/corporate/fancy-dress award shows.
Ms. (oops! Mrs.) Malaika, if Koena Mitra can get a lead role, so can you. Stop dancing, start acting.

• Talent hunt shows
  

It started off with 'Meri awaz suno' and likes. Meri Awaz suno gave us sunidhi Chauhan. Sare ga ma gave us Shreya Ghoshal and Kunal Ganjawala. Fast-forward 5 years....
Indian Idol gave us Abhijeet Sawant! Abhijeet Sawant of all people? That guy cannot talk let alone sing. So far so bad.... then Fame Gurukul gave us Qazi Tauqeer!!!!! just one word - WTF!
(Last heard the local dhobi association is hosting a best dhobi contest. Now theres a show where you can wash dirty linen in pulic ;-) )

• Breaking news

Samples :
1. (A ticker down the screen.....) "Amitabh Bachchan starts feeding on porridge....."
2. "Beto ne kiya maan baap ko jaayadad se bedakhal..... maa baap on bhook-hadtal"
3. "Gaai ne bachchde ko janm diya, 5 saal mein yeh teesri ghatna"
4. "TN ... water rises by 6 nm since last hour"
5. "We are so lame we do not have any content...... plus we make most of the news up"

• Remix songs

I've been forced to include this one. I love remix songs. </sarcasm>

• Cricketers in ads
  

Virender Sehwag has opened more coke bottles on TV than test innings and Yuvraj singh has grabbed more endorsement deals than catches (Md Kaif is a better fielder anyways). As with AB, these guys too are not very popular with advertising models.
Latest news is that Sachin Tendulkar is worth Rs 500 crores! India can win the world cup with this amount (match fixing, any one?).

• Birthday calendars

"I am collecting birthdays of all my friends. Please spare some time to fill in (your email-id. so we can spam you). "
Friend, if you wanna wish me on my b'day, send me a Porsche. If you can't, I cant afford the spam.
I do not send for B'day calendar mails to ppl. Theres a simple rule and it goes something like this - If I don't wish you on your b'day, it means you are not that important.
Get a life.

• Uday Chopra

He is 3 movies old. Thats 3 movies too many.
Suggestion - Take a long vacation to Mongolia. Take Tussssshaaar Kkapoor along. Don't come back.

• Top 10 lists

Shit!

For some one who is a devout reader of Douglas Adams, it is a shame that I've been stuck on the same page of "Restaurant at the end of the universe" since the last 2 days. H2G2 is THE series I've been religiously trying to follow since the last two months. I'd have finished the whole damn thing if not for the project work.
We, the developers, are always under pressure to deliver. Man! its not like we develop magic cure for cancer or something? Seesh..